Passport Kids - Final Day

Morning Celebration

Stretch!

We will be leaving for Memphis today and expect a 6pm or earlier arrival time. The kids have had a wonderful few days and have met new friends along the way. Most of the boys have taken at least one shower.

Passport Kids - Day 2

The Lake
Morning Celebration
Going to Bible Study group
The Night Market. Trading things and learning about other countries.
The Night Market
I told her to do it!
The huge slide. A big hit at camp.

The Night Market

PassportKids - Day 1

The boy's cabin...the girl's cabin looks the same.

Everyone was glad to arrive!

The passports hanging around our necks tell us the schedule and tell us what Bible study group we are in.

"I'm a blue square...I'm a green circle...I'm a red triangle...you mean we aren't in the same Bible study group?" Each passport is stamped with a color and shape that indicates which group they are in for Bible studies. As always, a few become a little nervous when they discover that we don't do everything within our church group. But by Monday they are thrilled with the new friends they have made.

No matter how sneaky I try to be...the girls always know when a camera is around.

Almost got away with a candid shot!

The volleyball court is a popular attraction.

However, I haven't seen an actual volley yet!

"Can't get one by me, Richard!"

RECFEST!!!

Charlotte with her great spirit!

It looks like we are starting some type of fascist government but really it is just the beginning of RecFest.

RecFest is a loud night of fun in the water. The games are ridiculous but keep the children entertained with mostly competitive relay games. They have a huge inflatable slip and slide, a beach ball volleyball game, a big wheel race, a moon bounce game, and some sort of adapted crab walk soccer game. But I think I had the most fun. They needed a couple of adults to stand at the side and spray water at all of the kids. I focused mainly on drenching members of our group and have to say it felt pretty good.

In summary, we had a perfect day. No car trouble and no bad weather. We arrived on time and everyone is excited about the coming days. I had my first McDonald's quarter pounder meal in over a year (I save it for these church trips). The kids really like exits with gas stations. I have come to find that children can have more fun at a big gas stations then they can have at Disney World. Me and the boys are sharing a cabin with Vestavia Hills Baptist Church from Birmingham AL. I used to be a member of VHBC in my seminary days so it has been nice catching up with some of the adult chaperones. The girls have a place of their own.

Today will be a day of morning celebration, Bible studies, personal devotions, camper's choices, meals together, a market fair, evening worship, worship response time, and church devotions.

Check back occasionally for more photos and commentary.

Passport 2008 - The Week in Review

Passport - Final Days

Alex on stage
Passport Summer Staff

In Charlotte...great wraps!!!

In Pidgon Forge...Dawn's View

Passport - Final Night

Worship Band

After worship and before Variety Show

8:30pm and still light out!

All are bummed that it is the last night of camp.

Tomorrow we leave at 11am and spend the night in Pigeon Forge.

The kids have had a wonderful time at Passways this year. As we shared highlights with each other during our church group devotional, I gathered that all enjoyed their specific classes. A few of them painted pictures in their classes...others learned team building and leadership skills...while others took ministry field trips. Hannah and Lottie visited a homeless shelter today. Alex was part of the camp council and was able to participate in a council-only water balloon fight. Main and his new friend Deon performed in the variety show together. Justin enjoyed his time of recess and enjoyed a long walk on campus with the group. Knight and Alex enjoyed their class on faith and the arts.

Everyone has been well-behaved. I think I have played more pranks than anyone. I think just about everyone has found some item of clothing in the freezer each morning.

Passport - Wednesday

The one thing I've discovered is that no matter how you as parents have raised them they will still live like animals...

but I have actually seen it worse than this so I can't say too much...

Notice the brown paper bag with who know what in it...the first aid kit left out for the many blisters...two of the 187 Dr. Peppers that they have finished...and the pretzel crumbs ground into the cheap carpet.

I feel better than I look. I tend to always forget my razor. "Is that Dr. Pepper on the ceiling?"

Over all, the kids are doing great and meeting new friends. Alex and Justin are in a recess group that focuses on team building and games. They like the trust fall the best and today there was a pool party just for them. Knight, Main, and Alex Ward are in a class dealing with faith and the arts. They get to write in a journal, strum instruments, and even visited a museum in Charlotte. And Lottie and Hannah are in a class called Echo. Echo involves field trips and discussions about full-time Christian vocation. No actual calling required but they get a chance to hear of the theological reasoning behind baptism, the Lord's Supper, funerals and such.

I actually don't get to see our youth too much during the day because I have to tote other kids around to there mission sites. I helped clear out some land for a woman who works with young adults who have gotten into some type of trouble along the way. We cut down several trees and supervised it all so that no kids would cut off a hand or a foot. No injuries yet. Passways has been focused on what Christians can do to help eradicate problems in the world. Scripturally based throughout, the youth explore practical ways to help hungry children, empower women, respond to the health needs in our world, and so on.

Virginia, Liberia is where our mission offering will go. Funds will go to the Ricks Institute. The Ricks Institute is a school that structurally survived the civil wars in Liberia but after some straight line winds blew through a while back they lost all electrical power. The mission offering will give them the opportunity to install solar power panels for electricity. Since the winds came through, they have taught classes in the dark.

Passport will help the lights be turned back on!

More Passport Pics

A night of line dancing

Our group....and new friend Deon

Knight at night

The Anti-Country Boy

Upon Arrival at the dance...where is A.W. anyway?

There he is.

Passport 2008 - Pigeon Forge

The view from Heaven's Gate

"Richard...why do they call them the Smoky Mountains?"

" Can we get back inside now?"


The cabin next door

Passport 2008

Well, it's the first night at Passport (or Passways) and things are going very well. Before we arrived at Wingate we lodged at a Pigeon Forge cabin named "Heaven's Gate." Everyone understood why it earned this name as it was the very last cabin on the particulare side of the mountain. I hate that we had to suffer through it. Three decks, a mountain view, a hot tub, several TV's, nice kitchen, and leather sofas. But it was the view that captivated everyone. Early that evening a strong thunderstorm passed through and actually blew over a huge steel gas grill that was on our deck. The storm didn't last long and we felt very safe but it was impressive to say the least. As we munched on our boiled hotdogs (no grill) we looked out and saw the most georgeous rainbow any of us had ever seen. And not only was it a rainbow, but a double rainbow against a golden sky. It made a complete arch from one mountain to the other. We forced all the teenagers to come outside and have their picture taken in front of the scene. Most just wanted to go back inside and finish watching "The World's Ugliest Dog Competition." It is difficult impressing teenagers these days.

So I have pics but I forgot my USB cable in the office. But I will obtain one tomorrow from the Monroe Radio Shack.

Today the youth met some new friends and found out exactly what they would be doing all week. Everyone is in good spirits and anticipats a good week. Alex Ward raced a big wheel on stage and did well. Knight Bracey and the rest of the group informed everyone that three unique things about our church was that it was far away from Wingate, that we had a vintage bowling alley, and that their are lots of old people in our church. It sounded more interesting than most other churches giving their list of unique characteristics.

Incidently, I have to tell you about my night prior to getting on the road. Years ago while in Birmingham I met a group of teenagers at Shades Mountain Baptist Church. The experience was well before a life of kids and full time ministry so I was able to spend countless hours over countless waffles at the local Homewood Waffle House. They spoke of wanting to be in a band one day...preferably a Christian band. My fear was that they would melt into the everyday worship band that resembled every other Christian band out there in a competitive market. You have to understand...these guys were great musicians, would talk about what was on their hearts, and were basically a comedy act when we met together. Preston, Kirk, Garrett, and Taylor. I just didn't want to see them become the average cookie cutter Christian band that preaches to the choir every Wednesday evening and Sunday morning.

So late Friday night I tuned in and watched them play on TV....on the David Letterman Show. These four young men finally made it by singing songs about the stuggles of life and God. "Wild Sweet Orange" is the band name and I pray that you hear all about them in the future.

So the time we spend with these kids...this time it's Alex, Alex, Hannah, Lottie, Justin, Knight and Main...is well worth it. Sometimes we are fortunate enough to see the good that we all do by committing our time to them while most of the time we do not see the fruits of our labor. Let us press forward at all times. Pray for us this week and pray that God will water the seeds that we plant.

Life After Life After Death

Where are our departed Christian loved ones anyway? I find it startling that we don't search the Scriptures for more of a definitive answer. We all speak of heaven but admittedly know little about it. We are unable to break free of the Hollywood version of what eternal life...or what heaven...is all about. Every once in a while we may read a Pauline passage that refers to the journey as involving two places...not just one destination of paradise. Are we all going to join the Christian departed in a state of sleepy unconsciousness until Jesus takes us home? Or does a middle state exist at all? Most of us were taught at a very young age that when a believer dies, he is instantly joined with Christ in eternity...no questions asked. Just the thought of a restful stop along the way is a painful sound to our Protestant ears.

For all of you that grew up as a Southern Baptist, you will be able to relate to the following conclusions concerning heaven.

1. It is a fuzzy place.

2. If you accept Christ you are in...even if you only half-heartily meant it in the first place.

3. Christ will be at the top of the stairway ready to give you a hug for believing in him rather than other religious leaders who teach that you must work for it.

4. This world matters but not really because it is going to be burned up one day.

5. Flesh is evil and enjoying the flesh is evil unless enjoyed through Christian marriage. Funny how marriage makes the flesh un-evil.

6. Because the flesh is evil...your soul is going to heaven to be with either a soul Jesus or a Jesus in bodily form. Who can really be sure of such things?

7. If there is a middle place along the journey to blissful paradise, it is only a type of sleep until God burns up the non-believers in true apocalyptic fashion. Duck!

8. Jesus will then be ready to take you to heaven where your ancestors and friends are already doing cartwheels. You will be instantly happy that you chose the Protestant Jesus over the Catholic Jesus or any other errant version preached from the church down the street.

9. You will be pleased to find that Jesus is tall, thin, and blue-eyed with sandy-blond hair.

10. Heaven will be a combination of everything you wanted to do but couldn't do on earth and a continuous, joyful praise to God. Although you won't admit it, your enthusiasm comes from the idea of playing ping-pong wherever you want and flying around anywhere you want.

I admit that I am being very sarcastic but there truly is part of me that resents not being told the truth as a child.

But here is what I have come to believe.

There is a middle place. It is not called purgatory. We do not have to work our way out of this middle place but we will remain in restful happiness until Jesus returns as Judge. (Even the most liberal among us must admit that judgement will have to come to those who took up the direction of evil and played it out in areas such as Rwanda and Dar fur)

Let's go ahead and call THIS place heaven...and refer to life after life...after death as the new creation. We'll keep our bodies but they will be made perfect. And this is why the hungry child matters. This is why the abused wife matters to us. We will be saved in our bodies and it will done in community. We will all enter the New Jerusalem together.

N.T. Wright adds that "it is on earth that things matter, not somewhere else." And maybe that is why Jesus spoke so seldom about future life (Gehenna or heaven).

It's time that the Christian church take up the language of eternity that will connect us to the world around us.

Thomas' Aha! Moment

N.T. Wright, one of my favorite New Testament writers, shares a parable from the Easter Oratorio. He writes that Thomas, like any good historian, wants to see and touch. He wants to remain in the protective realm of what he understands to be true and possible. So Jesus meets his request and presents himself to his sight and invites him to touch. But Thomas does not take Jesus up on his offer (which completetely goes against the image above) and comes to a place where he transends the type of knowing in which he is accustom and passes into a higher and richer one. So in the parable below, the image of the Red Sea is used to portray the doubt that Thomas faced and his transendent acceptance of what God can really do.

The sea is too deep
The heaven's too high
I cannot swim
I cannot fly;
I must stay here
I must stay here
Here where I know
How I can know
Here where I know
What I can know.

Jesus then reappears and invites Thomas to see and touch. Suddenly the new, giddying possibility appears before him:

The sea has parted. Pharaoh's hosts-
Despair, and doubt, and fear, and pride-
No longer frighten us. We must
Cross over to the other side.
The heaven bows down. With wounded hands
Our exiled God, our Lord of shame
Before us, living, breathing, stands;
The Word is near, and calls our name.
New knowing for the doubting mind,
New seeing out of blindness grows;
New trusting may the sceptic find
New hope through that which faith now knows.

And with that, Thomas takes a deep breath and brings history and faith together in a rush. "My Lord," he says, "and my God."

Heaven...vague and fuzzy optimism?

Jesus was raised from the dead. There is a certain promise made in this great God-event. The promise is that because Jesus was raised....I will be raised. But for some reason the Christian church, and many of its leaders, find it convenient to dilute this doctrine in order to pave a way for a feathery interpretation of eternity. In fact, our idea of heaven and hell has been madly shaped by our culture and we toy around with one of the most important and life-changing verses in the Bible; "On earth as it is in heaven."

I am guilty, even though I should know better, of perceiving death as a great enemy. Most of us feel this way because we don't understand what will happen to us one day and it is natural to fear the unknown. I see my children getting older and my hair getting thinner and I just can't stand it. And I imagine we all fall victim to believing that "heaven" can't be as good as this world because we will only praise a jealous God. Further, we won't be able to experience the tangibles that make this life so meaningful. These are our culturally driven ideas that invade our senses and really have nothing to do with the New Testament teachings of Jesus.

Imagine if the global church redefined its position on eternity and declared it no longer to be "heavenly" or "fuzzy" or a place where only your soul goes when the body dies. No wonder we struggle in areas of justice. If only our souls go to heaven, then the health of the mortal body is of no real importance; all will be worked out in the end. But that same verse keeps creeping back up on me, "on earth as it is in heaven."

Did you know that when the English churches began to preach about this feathery place where only your soul retreats, that social justice concerns began to be less important. It didn't take long for the American evangelical churches to preach only about repentance and salvation. This left little room for talk about what the Christian church should do about injustice, hunger, violence, abuse, civil rights, equality, and poverty. I do see the church catching up and finally realizing this great mistake; but we have a long way to go. I think change will come as soon as the majority of churches take on the old, forgotten doctrine of "the resurrection of the dead." Our society is ready for such talk. Society is screaming at the church to tell them something else besides the salvation of the soul. There is very little in the New Testament about the soul and heaven. However, there is a ton of passages that deal with how to actively live our lives as Christians during the here and now. Our faith should be practiced in community and it should exist for people outside the church.

So, if we begin to reexamine our view of heaven then we may begin to realize that Jesus taught about a New Jerusalem; a new creation and a new earth. And there lies our connection to the world around us...to all living things. We should care about the welfare of others and of ourselves because our bodies do matter. Jesus was raised in bodily form and we will be raised in bodily form. That should be our hope and now all of a sudden, eternity seems real and perfect, not fuzzy and only optimistic thinking.

A Season for the Spirit: The Death of God-With-Us

Examine the painting above. I'm not quite sure what to with it because we are so far removed from the ancient interpretation of what took place on the dark Saturday before the resurrection. Here we have Jesus busting through a door, stepping on the devil, and liberating all the individuals that have been held captive. And of course, Jesus keeps his boring expression on his face like Indiana Jones keeps his hat on his head.

But...there is quite a bit of truth in the painting; that is, depending on how we take the strange bit of creed that has Jesus descending into Hell. I'm not quite sure what happened on the second day. I know that Jesus died. As Martin Smith states, "the death of God-with-us." Jesus was not just sleeping and let us keep in mind the disciples anticipated nothing. Holy Saturday was silent.

Scripture tell us that by joining all the dead in their suffering, Jesus gave them access to new community of love that would spring into life with his resurrection. Ultimately, we cannot avoid the meaning of the Christ-event that proved that no one is beyond the reach of redemption. It is my opinion that when a believer takes this truth on, then it should dictate his perspective on war, the death penalty, revenge, love, forgiveness, and indifference. This entire joining the dead stuff is really strange and difficult to comprehend.

So the painter above and the writers of Scripture (1 Peter 3:18) describe a mythic image of "strangely moving power. Christ through his own death joins the dead (hear this now...even the dead) but as the herald of their liberation." In some way, our salvation will completed as a community. This will forever remain a mystery to me.

The death and resurrection possess life-giving power. We need not only think of Christ descending into Hell as a one time event. Because the death and resurrection prove that no present hell is too far out of reach for the life-giving power of God. Whether WWII, Iraq, or violence in Memphis TN; people can experience a hell in which love seems miles away. But there is no place in the world, in me, in you, or in death that God's love cannot reach.

A Season for the Spirit: Numbered with the Transgressors

It is Good Friday. All of us have mixed feelings about it. We call it Good Friday because of what we know to be true. However, we also know that it was everything but good. I often wonder if this term was created because it is so difficult for believers to accept the violence and unconditional love expressed by the event. This was a violent baptism... yet believers are bent on "building up our false selves on the principle that we are right and good enough." To call it a bad Friday would create in us a sense of solidarity with all people (stealers, beggers, and murderers) and would force us to understand the magnitude of the love spilled out at Calvary. To refer to it as Good Friday makes us smile.

This may seem a bit radical, and maybe Martin Smith would disagree, but Good Friday creates all kinds of mixed emotions for me. We celebrate it by a joyous term and then read the Scriptures with all kinds of dread and sadness. We say "It is finished!" and then we proceed with the next day's Easter Egg Hunts. I ate at IHOP with my family because we wanted to do something different for Good Friday. Yet in a few minutes I am going to walk into our chapel with a service that ends in the slamming of the Bible and the blowing out of a candle. Mixed feelings.

Jesus also experienced mixed emotions about the coming hours. He felt an overbearing dread of what was to come but also yearned in agony for the good it would ulitimately do. "...and what stress I am under until it is completed!"

Dread and yearning. In his death he would "show the magnitude of his identification with us in our alienation."

He was numbered with the transgressors. Just a number. Solidarity with everyone; not just the moral, ethical, or elite. "For each Good Friday to be good the Spirit must take us by the hand and reestablish our contract with that inmost core of recalcitrant evil, enmity, and impotence where we are sisters and brothers of the most depraved and lost. That is where Christ is, clasping them with his pierced hands."

I lied to someone today. A begger, outside of the restaraunt mentioned above, asked me for money. I said no. Actually I tried to clean it up a bit and told him that I didn't have anything but plastic. But I had plenty of one dollar bills in my wallet. So after I started up my van, I sat there and realized what I had done on this Good Friday. I saw my equal in God's eyes and immediately rejected a moment of solidarity with him. I did give him $2 as I exited the parking lot. He was a good man and thankful. And then I felt the pride as my children watched me do a good deed. But I question whether I truly meant anything by this at all. Was it guilt? Would I have done this on any other week other than Holy Week? I don't have the answer. But I do know this; that God will not be pleased until the meaning of the cross is evident in every action I take toward others. He will not quit until I live a solidarity with all human beings. For the Christ-event did not take place to make me into a moral person or a better person; the cross took place so that I could fully identify my true alienation from him. Jesus on the cross took place so that I could see my solidarity with beggers and notice how far removed from God if I am left to my own ways.

And Jesus asks us to take up our cross...daily. What does this mean in my relation to a begger hunched down below the windows of the restaraunt so that he won't be noticed? "I take up the cross and follow Jesus whenever I acknowledge my oneness with the guilty, whenever I stop pretending that they are an alien class. I put my cross down and hide among the moral crowd whenever I gloat over the sins of others; whenever I thank God that I am not as other men are."

"In prayer, I must practice being numbered among the many...the transgressors...and must start to care for this company where I belong."

She cut all the morbid stories out of the newspaper-the accounts of women who had been raped and criminals who had escaped and children who had been burned and of train wrecks and plane crashes and the divorces of movie stars. She took these to the woods and dug a hole and buried them and then she fell on the ground over them....She groaned "Jesus, Jesus"...her legs and arms spread out as if she were trying to wrap them round the earth.
- Flannery O'Connor, Greenleaf

A Season for the Spirit: If I Do Not Wash You...

What reluctance we all have when it comes to being humbly served by Jesus the servant! What revulsion we possess at the mere thought of Jesus uncovering our filthy feet and washing them! Smith reminds us that this revulsion is an unveiling of our resistance we will bring to Calvary where the one who took the form of a servant, humbled himself to death on a cross.

"'The foot-washing throws light on how the cross judges us. Will we accept absolute and unconditional love and allow it to envelope us? After the washing, Judas was disgusted with him and ran out into the night to betray Jesus. The mystery of damnation is the possibility deep in the heart of every human being of totally repudiating the embrace of divine Love in the final "No."'

"The mystery of salvation is the possibility in the heart of every human being of overcoming our dread of unconditional love and consenting with a yielding 'Yes' to its victory over our shame and the healing of our alienation."

God alone can do what needs to be done. God alone can overcome the separation, demolish the barrier, fill in the lack, annihilate the debt. "While we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly."

Christ is who gives us our personhood. I think that is part of the Christian gospel that is most neglected. Christ makes us into who we are meant to be...he gives us our identity born from above. Again, he gives us our personhood. So I find it interesting that somewhere along the discovery we choose to go it alone. We reject the one who gives us our meaning, purpose, and personhood and "make a fateful bargain to rid ourselves of the hope of being loved absolutely." We are hell-bent on earning our love and not being loved unless we deserve it. We forget that Jesus the servant took a knee and humbly washed his disciples feet. One ran out. Others stayed. And Jesus spoke some pretty strong words with no sentimentality attached. He said, "Unless I wash you, you have no share with me."

What do these words mean to you? Do you and I run away from the truth of being unconditionally loved by Jesus the Servant? We have accepted the love of God on a cross but we often remain mired in a stubborn reluctance. May we all, on this Maundy Thursday, look toward the cross of tomorrow and accept the divine love that is present.

A Season for the Spirit: The Disciple Whom Jesus Loved

Jesus needed companionship. The Scriptures are very clear, in my opinion, that Jesus took comfort in the company of his disciples. This typically doesn't cause any controversy. However, the Gospels also clearly show that Jesus had a favorite. And that interpretation may make people either very uncomfortable or angry.

I'm sure there are people in both camps (conservative and liberal) who are offended at the notion that Jesus had a favorite disciple. A conservative MAY believe there is little room for a Jesus needing anything at all, especially a close friend. On the other hand, a liberal MAY take issue with the idea of Jesus not regarding everyone as equals. I understand these generalizations are not exactly necessary but the point is this; that we become distressed to think of Jesus needing the intimacy of a particular friendship. The word 'intimate' is enough for some of us to think we are all sliding down a slippery slope in which we can never return.

"But does Jesus needing an intimate relationship with a friend show him to be too vulnerable for our liking."

But Jesus' favorite disciple, who goes nameless, is recorded as lying close to Jesus' breast. Ignoring the centuries and customs, I have to say that Jesus must have been an extremely likeable person. And maybe this quality is what we often fail to capture. The last thing I want to do is to make Jesus into my 'buddy' or 'pal' but it is worth noting that this particular disciple was very fond of Jesus. Are you feeling uneasy yet?

This is personal...this is physical...and the minute we try to dilute the meaning or ignore it is when we are taken back the slow-paced passage of the last supper in which we are all asked to participate with Jesus in something both sad and...intimate.

Even the leaning over to Jesus' breast sounds like an uncomfortable position. We all stand a bit puzzled at the beloved disciple. Maybe this is why we relate so well to him. Who among us doesn't feeled puzzled most of the time about how we should feel and what we should be doing with the living Christ. We know that our minds can't fully grasp who he is. He seems to move in the shadows behind us rather than revealing himself in the daylight. He accompanies us through dark times but rarely saves us from them. We depend on the spiritual elite to convince us that he really is there and really is alive. We learn the hard way that our doubt in him is something that can lead us to a deeper relationship.

We all relate to the awkwardness of the disciple placing his head on Jesus. What should be our approach? What should be our attitude toward his kindness and mercy? We know he is compassionate but at times it this truth behaves like mere words on a page.

Peter was just as puzzled. He didn't understand how this particular disciple's life would unfold following the resurrection. So what did Jesus tell his beloved disciple?

He told him to remain (abide).

"Maybe he goes unnamed so that we can better accept the he bears witness to an intimacy that is meant for each of us. His closeness is a sign of a closeness that is meant for me and you."

We are called to live and we are called to pray...close to the heart of Jesus. And this is not mere affection. The disciple could hear the pounding heart of the one who anticipated arrest, torture, and death.

"To live close to the heart of Jesus would mean living in contact with the joy and agony of Christ. in prayer, if we would just allow ourself to be loved instead of talking so much we would enter into the joy of Christ. And the simplicity of that would allow us to enter into the pain of God.

A Season for the Spirit: The Doubters

Warning! You are about to read some of the most meaningful words on faith and doubt that you will ever read. Most, if not all words, can be credited to Martin L. Smith.

Only one requirement is necessary in order to understand. You must in some way believe that we possess an inner society of selves or at least be grappling with this possibility.

With practice we discover that there are a number of doubters within us, and they are all different.

Sometimes in the climate of prayer we discover that certain doubts are like angels, agents of the Spirit of truth who is struggling to strip away from us superstitious and immature beliefs.

Doubts about doctrines and moral rules may be the only way the Spirit of truth can get us to move from accepting Christianity at secondhand, to appropriating it for ourselves in the light of our own experience and questions. The Spirit can work better with us even if our faith is stripped right down for a time, than if we are cocooned in a complacent religiosity that we are not prepared to have disturbed.

One of our doubters seems more dangerous. His voice asks us to admit that the very existence of a loving God is implausible. He points out the Holocaust, the devastation of the exploding AIDS crisis, the blood-soaked history of the churches, and asks how long we are going to persist in the venerable fiction that God is love.

But if we give room even to this doubter in our prayers we might find ourselves led back to the foot of the cross to hear the agonized cry of Jesus, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"

It is not true that there is obviously a God. It is not true that God is obviously loving. The radical doubter may be a kind of very austere prophet within us whom the Spirit of truth uses to make us face the extent of God's own hiddenness and silence.

I am grateful to my atheist friends; they have taught me not to cheat

There are other doubters in our inner society whom we need to bring to Jesus in prayer so that he can confront them. They mock our hopes, pour cold water on our trust in God, and tell us to stay with what common sense says is safe and sure. These he needs to challenge and disturb.

They are the sick and indigent parts of our self, the survivors of past disappointments and abandonment's, who draw on the inner fund of hopelessness that is part of our fallen human nature. When we hear them we must be urgent in bringing them to Jesus and specifically ask for healing.

- Martin L. Smith

A Season for the Spirit: The Slow Corrosion of Self Doubt

There is no doubt about it. As a minister I primarily preach and teach the Jesus of demands. For some of this I make no apology. I believe that Jesus does make demands on our lives. He never forces his person and teachings on us but there are demands that God, working through his living son, makes upon our lives.

However, does anyone really pause to reflect on the Christ of affirmation? I used to hear about a man who used to pass out small paintings of a laughing Jesus. To me, this was just a creative way to make sure that Jesus remains our "buddy" or friend instead of the Jesus of service and demand.

But maybe there is a middle ground. There has to be a middle ground because we see evidence of service and gratitude in Scripture. Martin L. Smith likes for people to experience God through the gift of imagination. He encourages people to stop and imagine Jesus approaching them on a beach. Jesus has a different expression on his face; different than the usual solemn expression in which we often characterize him. In this scene, participants are encouraged to imagine Jesus with an expression of gratitude. As he approaches, "his intention is to thank you for all that you do for him." How would this make you feel? What does Christ say?

It truly is a strange feeling isn't it? Jesus, my savior, thanking me for all I do as a follower. Jesus, thanking me for using my gifts that were given to me by the Holy Spirit.

Many will be tempted to reject this idea. To open the possibility of being thanked by Christ is to welcome pride. The way to stay humble is to reject praise from others and from God. Christ must be put in his rightful place.

"I am just an ordinary church-goer," you might tell yourself. Or you may deflect any kind of praise, minimize what you do, and be quick to detect flaws. I tend to just change the conversation or dilute any appreciation so as to not come across as 'one of those kind of ministers.' In my own humble reaction there is pride. But if this continues in all of us then we can become guilty of the corrosion of self-doubt; and it is a slow process. Trust me. It creeps up and it will never loudly announce its presence.

So what is the solution? Allow Christ to thank you. Allow others to thank you. Accept the gratitude of others all the while knowing that they are God's gifts...not yours. Only then can we sincerely compliment others and allow our return compliments to be sincere.

"True humility comes from allowing our own gifts to be properly affirmed."

"It is only when we really accept God's appreciation of us and know ourselves to be gifted through the Holy Spirit that we can communicate to others the same blessing."

"For how can we give what we do not allow ourselves to receive?"

A Season for the Spirit: Congratulations to the Poor!

"Congratulations to the poor!" proclaimed Jesus in what we call the Beatitudes, a pious term which helps us muffle the impact. - Martin L. Smith

But is Jesus saying congratulations to the people we often criticize with words such as "lazy,"unambitious," "uneducated," because they have accepted their terrible destiny and only dream of heaven?

Not exactly. If we keep reading in the Beatitudes we discover that Jesus is referring to the poor as "blessed" because they "thirst for righteousness." They want wrongs to be righted and this is the way God's righteousness works. His justice set wrongs right. The hungry and poor among us desire change, a word that our current presidential nominees have already worn out, and they yearn for a type of justice that gives them a respectable life with a respectable future.

I come up with excuses to NOT be as involved as I should be. My excuses are often, "I cannot speak to their environment. Let someone else who truly knows do it. That way, it is more sincere." Another is, "I need more money in my pocket too. I have expensive children and energy prices are on the line." And then I become frustrated at the politicians that are going to try to take more of my money away from me. "Let me become a bit more settled and then I will give." And then I go to Starbucks for my grande mocha latte.

All of this is true. Life is expensive and my priority should be my families future and a consistent giving to my church...the people I know very well.

But we all know the answer is not pocket change. It's not even found through handsome donations to individuals in need. I am committed to giving my pocket change to those who ask but we all know and realize that this will not create the necessary component to alter the life of poor people in each city.

The answer is CHANGE. (again, not the change in our pockets)

Poverty is more systematic than we wish to admit.
Wealth itself depends on a dissociation with the poor. And I have found that politics often distort the true nature of the wealthy in our country. Rich people are not mean and evil. They are usually nice and giving. But the separation between rich and poor exist.

"The problems are systematic, vast, the changes necessary so revolutionary, the resistances so colossal...while I analyze and cultivate my pious hopelessness I can keep my hand over my wallet. Sometimes, though I would not dare to say it out loud, I reckon that poverty is actually the human condition and will never change. Therefore, the claims of the poor must be resisted. With such falsehoods I struggle against the Spirit to keep out of solidarity with the poor."

If God is calling each of us to have solidarity with the poor, then we must allow the Spirit to make known the poverty within us. We have to allow the Spirit to speak the Beatitudes to the poor within us. We must internalize our dependence on God. We need him. We need change. Each of us within.

Jesus prime concern was that we discover this unique need for our own "daily bread" and "deliverance from evil." So let us not be fearful of praying for ourselves. Isn't it amazing that even when we pray for others. we are many times doing this so that we will not have to pray for ourselves? And if we do not pray for ourselves, we deny the Spirit an opportunity to show us how needy we are. Each of us within.

Only then can we promote change in our communities. Let us not condemn our needy self to silence. If we do this then we will forever disassociate ourselves from the poor around us and things will never change.